Archive for month: April, 2023

Let’s jump into the fascinating concept of “romantic sacrifice” in relationships, and why it’s important for both men and women to understand. It’s not as complicated as it sounds! Men and women give all kinds of cues that go unnoticed.

Sacrifice is like a double-edged sword in relationships. On one side, it seems incredibly romantic. On the other hand, it can lead to compromise gone wrong and, worst of all, the dreaded resentment rollercoaster ride. Understanding the hormonal differences between men and women is the key to unraveling this mystery. We’ll break it down for ya.

In men, the act of sacrifice triggers the release of testosterone, the hormone of champions! Having sufficient testosterone levels makes sacrificing for their partners feel like an epic feat for men. It’s like being a hero, sweeping in to save the day with a grand gesture. If he loves you, he wants to be your hero. Remember those early days in a relationship when a man selflessly offered his jacket to Bae? That’s man stuff!

Here’s the catch…When testosterone levels run low, sacrifice doesn’t give that same feel-good boost. It can leave him feeling depleted and drained. Sacrificing on an empty tank over time is a recipe for the infamous resentment rollercoaster.  You want to avoid that!

Now, let’s shift gears and talk about women and their unique experiences with romantic sacrifice. When a woman sacrifices her own needs for Bae, it’s not exactly the stuff of romance novels. It’s not about women being more “selfish”.  It’s simply that releasing testosterone doesn’t have the same stress-reducing, feel-good effect on women as it does on men.

But wait! God knew exactly what He was doing! There’s another hormone in town, oxytocin!  Women are natural givers, lovers, and nurturers. When women give from a place of abundance, it’s like a hormonal jackpot. The slot machine is going off!

Giving from a full heart releases oxytocin, which lowers her stress levels and feels incredibly rewarding. It’s like a warm, cozy hug for her soul.

However, when she gives from a place of stress or scarcity, awww Mahn!  It turns into sacrifice. Everyone gets a free ticket on the resentment rollercoaster! To prevent this, ya’ll, find ways to give from a place of fullness and abundance.

Now that we’ve unraveled the mysteries of romantic sacrifice, let’s talk about two simple steps to eliminate resentment in relationships. These steps apply to everyone, regardless of gender.

Firstly, it’s crucial to recognize when you’re not in a position to give. Before saying “yes” to your partner’s requests or seeking support, take a moment to check in with yourself. Ask, “Do I have the emotional or physical capacity to give right now, or will I end up mad if I do this?” If you can give wholeheartedly, do so! But leave reserves for you. It if is going to take all you have in the moment, reconsider.  If you’re not in the right space at all, it’s perfectly okay to say, “I can’t right now, but I’d be happy to help you later.” Setting those boundaries can save you from resentment down the road.

Secondly, giving from a place of fullness and abundance is important. For men, this means focusing on rebuilding your testosterone levels. When your testosterone is low, sacrifice feels heavy. There are ways to boost your testosterone naturally! Take some “cave time” to recharge and refuel. Whether it’s watching TV, playing a video game, or simply resting, find activities that help you rebuild. Sis, sometimes you gotta leave that man be!

Simple changes, and new insight, can bring on light bulb moments. What light came on for you? We hope it was a bright one!

Are you struggling with feelings of resentment in your relationships? We have just the solution for you! Introducing our highly effective resentment webinar that will help you break free from those emotional blocks and find a path toward resolution.

Resentment can be a real relationship killer. We can give you tips, but you gotta get on the other side. It’s essential to address it head-on. Our webinar is designed to provide you with the tools and strategies to overcome resentment and foster healthier, happier connections. Check it out and get off the rollercoaster ride!

See ya soon,

THE HIM and Naaila

Hello Parent!

Parenting has been one of the most painful and rewarding and selfless and never-ending journey’s we’ve ever done. For those with younger children, this is for you.

As a matter of fact, this may help with the older ones too!
When we give consequences, we are teaching natural consequences exist for actions. In addition, the child has to take responsibility for their behavior.

It is vital to remember consequences should be age-appropriate and reasonable.You are building and planting the seed for a future adult the world will experience. Let this be one of your best ventures ever!

When you choose consequences ahead of time …

*you are more likely to be fair

*your child knows to expect the consequences to fit the misbehavior

*you can teach missing skills to help your child improve long-term behavior

Sound consequences are:

• Mild—does not cause physical or emotional harm

• Kind—does not involve anger, yelling, humiliation, threats, or shame. Shame is a common one on social media.

• Logical—results logically from the misbehavior

*Instructive—involves practicing the missing skill

• Understood—agreed upon beforehand

• Simple to give and track (e.g. a Chores Jar and Tracking Sheet)

• Consistent—negative behavior results in negative consequence

• Loving—followed by a sincere expression of affection

• Safe—never violates a child’s basic human rights to food, shelter, emotional and physical safety, love, or education.

As Parents, let’s be better. Your child deserves it.

See ya soon,

THE HIM and Naaila

Today, let’s dive into a topic that hits home for many of us. Redefining success. We live in a world where society often dictates what success should look like, but guess what? It’s time to break free from molds and create your definitions of personal fulfillment.

Picture this: you’re a college-educated, ambitious person with dreams and aspirations as bright as the morning skyline. Have you ever considered whether your goals align with your desires and values? It’s time to challenge those societal norms and explore alternative paths to success that put your happiness and self-fulfillment front and center. You could be denying parts of what you really want and not notice it. Sometimes folks have normalized doing what others want.

Here’s the deal: success isn’t a one-size-fits-all concept. It’s about living life on your own terms and finding joy in the journey. How do you start redefining success and pursuing personal fulfillment?

First, take a deep breath. Ask yourself, “What brings me joy?” It could be traveling the world, pursuing a creative passion or making a difference in your community. Never forget, what brings you joy may not be the thing that gets most of your time. Sometimes, it is not your job!

Embrace those dreams. Don’t be afraid to go after them, even if they don’t fit the conventional mold.

Next, it’s time to let go of the fear of judgment. It is everywhere. It lurks. It is in your face. Society might have certain expectations, but remember, this is YOUR life. Surround yourself with a supportive tribe of like-minded individuals who champion your choices and encourage  growth.

Finally, celebrate the small wins along the way. Success isn’t always about big milestones or reaching specific benchmarks. It’s about finding fulfillment in everyday moments, appreciating the journey, and honoring your progress. If you gave the day all ya got, and that equals 40%, well done!

We’ve got you on this journey of redefining success. Our  self-acceptance webinar is packed with inspiring stories, practical tips, and exercises. Uncover your true passions, set meaningful goals, and design a life that aligns with your values. Do it boldly without limiting beliefs about you.

So, beautiful souls, it’s time to rewrite the rules of success and pursue fulfillment beyond societal expectations. Love on you. This isn’t getting your nails done. Think about it. Your nails have been done. Your face could be beat, but internally, your emotional face is bruised. Let your self-compassion be the compass to lead the way. Grab the recorded webinar, with the exercises included.  Join the movement. Redefine success and the nurturing of self. It’s a beautiful bond to see!

See ya soon,

THE HIM and Naaila